Diners' Dilemma

Sometimes a meal is so perfect that I find myself thinking ahead to the end. What, I ponder, should be my last bite? With which gustatory sensation do I want to end the evening, which flavor is to be the lingering memory? It takes a little planning, and isn't often easy.

Well, tough times are everywhere.

Anyway, I was thinking of it tonight as my wife and I worked our way to the end of an excellent meal at a new (to us) place in Seattle. Not fancy, not particularly expensive for what we got; just really nicely done, every portion nearing the perfect Platonic ideal of its iteration. As usual, we ordered different items, and passed them back and forth. It was all good. I made my choice, lined up a couple of forkfuls, followed the plan. It was the right one, tiding me over until the chocolate terrine arrived, thence to take its place among the top ten desserts of my lifetime.

As the world keeps wobbling on its axis, as our politics continue their descent into the impossible, it was a pleasant diversion. Planning the last morsel of a meal, as opposed to contemplating the last days of America.

USA!! USA!! USA!!

Some there are who -- depending where their heads are on the timeline of inevitability -- either fear or rue the fall of the US from world dominance. Me, I don't much care about global rankings; but I DO care about the reasons for the decline. It's one thing to get edged out in a hard-fought and keenly met fight; sooner or later tides turn. It's quite another to have deliberately stabbed oneself in the brain. (Nor is the aforementioned reference singular: Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck are the evident leaders of a movement based on deriding intellect, rejecting fact, and literally honoring its own ignorance. And, based on surveys, who can doubt they're riding a wave?)

So I was pleased to read this article (thanks for sending it, JB) in which I learned that there's at least one American still striving to be number one:

Donna Simpson, from New Jersey, weighs 273kg but told the Daily Mail newspaper she had her heart set on reaching her goal weight of 1000lb (450kg) in two years.

The 42-year-old already holds the title of the world's fattest mother after giving birth to her daughter in 2007 when she weighed 241kg.

"I'd love to be 1000lb ... it might be hard though, running after my daughter keeps my weight down," Ms Simpson told the Daily Mail.

In the article, there are several interesting details:

Her 49-year-old partner Philippe — who she met on a dating site for plus-size people — was encouraging her to reach her goal, she said.

"I think he'd like it if I was bigger ... he's a real belly man and completely supports me," she said......In order to pay for the enormous amounts of food she is eating — her weekly grocery bill is $815 — Ms Simpson makes money by running a website where men pay to watch her consume fast food.

Really, it's an all-American story, full of family values: she has loving support, and she's self-employed. And who knew there were "belly" men? (Well, maybe I am, too, if by "belly" this is what you mean. Just enough sweet softness over the recti to make it a touchable two-pack.... um... I digress... Sorry....)

The lady is an inspiration. I may have to get a web-cam. Let me know what you'd pay to watch me do.

So, you go, girl. Take our country over the top. We're right there with you (as long as you don't end up in our particular insurance pool, and as long as we're not playing teeter-totter.)