Beach And Moan

Of the heads under the hats tossed into the main ring of the circus, i.e. those vying for Speakership of the House, seven of nine voted against certifying the fraud-free election of Joe Biden. All of them voted against the January 6 Commission, the Bipartisan Infrastructure Act, banning wage discrimination based on sex, ensuring the right to contraception, and the CHIPS and Science Act. Only one voted to reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act; only one – a different one – voted to cap insulin costs; and only one – still another – voted for expanding healthcare to veterans exposed to toxins in the line of duty. This is what it takes to be a leader of a governance-incapable party: someone who’ll take them deeper into the wilderness. 

From the nine, House Rs first selected Tom Emmert (R-Nowhere), who lasted four hours, until Trump trashed him. “I killed him,” he bloated. Finally, emerging from the swamp, fourth-choice and farthest right of the far-right, Mike Johnson (R-Anti-everything, see preceding link) won the day. A founding father of overturning the election, defender of January 6, enthusiastic promoter of impeaching President Biden, opponent of Ukraine aid, anti-LGBT warrior, a nationwide abortion-ban zealot who said if it weren’t for Roe v. Wade, we’d have millions of healthy workers paying taxes to offset top-end tax cuts, and an anti-voting rights hero, he’s a Trumpist’s Trumpist, introduced Trumpically. 

Certain to continue with their new Speaker, in today’s Republican Party, manufactured outrage is broadcast in unison, like an mp3. Their latest concerto of criticism, overture of outrage, symphony of scandal, is that, after returning from Israel where he spoke forthrightly about Israel’s right to defend itself as well as the need to protect and aid Palestinian civilians, and rallied international support, President Biden took a walk on a beach.

“Americans are still being held hostage by Hamas terrorists — and Joe Biden is at the beach,” posted the RNC on Xwitter. Nearly verbatim, the expected mouths foamed it on repeat. On the Fox “news” website, a headline shouted, “Iconic rapper unleashes scathing rebuke of Biden’s beach getaway as war rages (sic) Gaza.” Earlier, it read “50 Cent” rather than “Iconic rapper,” until they realized their audience wouldn’t know who 50 Cent is; namely, someone whose political opinions are worth less than that.

To understand this next bit of spumescent tergiversation from MAGAland, an analogy helps: Consider a road through a residential neighborhood on which people dangerously break the speed limit. Say the local police have done little about it. Then imagine a new cop arrives and starts arresting speeders like never before. What if the local paper began criticizing the new guy, saying all those arrests prove the street is more unsafe than ever? See? MAGAs point to the huge increase in interdictions of people on the terrorist watchlist under President Biden as proof... (In fairness, “interdiction” is a bigger word than Trumpists are used to hearing.)

No analogy is needed for the bogosity of the latest “bombshell” from James Comer (R-Weaponization), that their Foxy “investigation” has discovered a check for $200,000 given to President Biden by his brother. (He wasn’t in office at the time.) A smoking gun? Only if repaying a loan is corrupt. What it is is another example of Joe Biden being there for his family. What it also is is the most pathetic, desperate attempt yet by Comer to smear President Biden. And laughable. Poor guy tries so hard. He has no reason to stop, though, as the Foxotrumpified will only process that there was a check, somewhere, proving... something. Because “laundering money” via personal check is how it’s done, right?

Counting on loyalists to keep defending the indefensible, Trump just promised, if elected, to keep out immigrants who don’t like “our” religion, and revealed to his rapt rally-goers that he’d discovered how “us” is spelled. On a corybantic roll, he then misidentified Republican hero autocrat, Victor Orban, as the leader of Turkey. (Imagine if President Biden had done that!) He’ll also pull “us” out of NATO (that sound you heard was cheers from the Kremlin.)

As Trump’s rally-based ramblings become increasingly incoherent, bespeaking a man losing what’s left of his mind, he manages to maintain control of a party that threw in with him in 2016, knowing he was an unfit, amoral conman. Despite his real-time unraveling, they’re in too deep to quit him. Their speakership clown-show genuflection proves it.